I am in complete shock. I am so blessed to have so many people who love and support me. I am thankful for the love and encouragement that I have gotten for my trip so far. From the moment I woke up God has blessed me, I even teared up on my way to work. I am overwhelmed with God's love for me.
This morning when I was on my way to work, I was at a stop light and started praying. In the middle of my prayer I noticed the car in front of me, on their license plate it said, "No worries... I've got it covered!" That's it. That was my confirmation that my Heavenly Father not only loves me, but He wants to pour His love on me.
To me, my Honduras missions trip is only part of this overwhelming feeling.
For almost nine months, my life has been at a dead stand still. I have not only had to learn to naturally let go of my son, I have had to come to terms with knowing the result of my decision looks very different then it was supposed to be. No birth mother should have to deny their child or hide the love they have for their baby. Feeling no freedom to love, to celebrate, or feel appreciated.. So for the past nine months, when I laid my head down on my pillow at night, I was alone. Although I knew God was going to make sense of my pain some day, I didn't know when that would be, but until then, I waited, waited for His mystery to revealed.
God has been revealing me so much to me lately. In my heart I feel like His moving me. He is wanting me to not only have peace, but to stand out, unashamed, with raw faith, and share my heart and share my story! I am at the point where I do not feel like He has to carry me anymore, I feel like He has set me down on my feet and holding my hand saying,"I'm right here, let's start walking, I've got you." That, is my peace. He is my peace. I know there is gonna be some days when I will get scared or get doubtful, and want Him to pick me up again. But He has given me strength to walk. Giving me strength to forgive.
This morning when I was on my way to work, I was at a stop light and started praying. In the middle of my prayer I noticed the car in front of me, on their license plate it said, "No worries... I've got it covered!" That's it. That was my confirmation that my Heavenly Father not only loves me, but He wants to pour His love on me.
To me, my Honduras missions trip is only part of this overwhelming feeling.
For almost nine months, my life has been at a dead stand still. I have not only had to learn to naturally let go of my son, I have had to come to terms with knowing the result of my decision looks very different then it was supposed to be. No birth mother should have to deny their child or hide the love they have for their baby. Feeling no freedom to love, to celebrate, or feel appreciated.. So for the past nine months, when I laid my head down on my pillow at night, I was alone. Although I knew God was going to make sense of my pain some day, I didn't know when that would be, but until then, I waited, waited for His mystery to revealed.
God has been revealing me so much to me lately. In my heart I feel like His moving me. He is wanting me to not only have peace, but to stand out, unashamed, with raw faith, and share my heart and share my story! I am at the point where I do not feel like He has to carry me anymore, I feel like He has set me down on my feet and holding my hand saying,"I'm right here, let's start walking, I've got you." That, is my peace. He is my peace. I know there is gonna be some days when I will get scared or get doubtful, and want Him to pick me up again. But He has given me strength to walk. Giving me strength to forgive.
"He is not only beside you, He is in front of you, beside you, and He has got your back."
This is a new season for me. This is my time to have peace, and celebrate freely God's blessings in my life, PAST and present.